Are you ready for greater independence in a home you can call your own?
After you find the location, home and support systems that are just right for you, it’s time to do something you may never have thought possible: Move into a place you can call your own and explore your newfound independence—reinforced over time through practice, natural consequences and ever-increasing confidence.
Ready for your next set of challenges?
Making the most of your new life may come with some uncertainty and fear. Will it be hard to get to know your new surroundings? What will it be like to meet neighbors and make new friends? What will you do with your free time?
This article will help you get comfortable in your new home and surroundings with easy strategies and steps to follow so—someday in the future—you can open your front door and say, “Home sweet home!”
Adjusting to Living Independently
Re-create what makes you feel secure and comfortable.
Organize your space. You probably already know what works for you. Labels or color coding can help identify things you use regularly. Organizing food items in your kitchen can make meal prep easier. Note where you keep things like cleaning products and backup toilet paper. Household items you use most often should be easy to find. By creating predictability in your new home, you’ll reduce stress; clutter in our home can sometimes create clutter in our mind. Keep things in their place once you decide where they go.
Routines work wonders. It helps to establish some sameness in your daily activities, so make a schedule, including when you want to:
- Wake up and go to bed.
- Eat meals.
- See family and friends.
- Do laundry.
- Take a shower.
- Run errands/go shopping.
- Clean up around the house.
- Do things for fun.
Keep your schedule handy—on your phone and in a visible location at home. Don’t hesitate to make small modifications to your schedule as you add activities and meet new people.
Pay attention to your sensory sensitivities. A calm, peaceful atmosphere always feels welcoming. Know what colors put you at ease and how lighting and noise affect you. You may even consider some low-maintenance plants—a little greenery can be relaxing. Having neighbors means there may be unexpected sounds and smells. It may be a good idea to use noise cancelling earphones or air fresheners.
Know your budget. Make a weekly budget and include what you’ll need for:
- Rent
- Groceries
- Entertainment
- Transportation
- Clothes
- Miscellaneous items
Just like your schedule, make adjustments as needed.
Consider technology solutions. There are many technological tools that support greater independence. Explore your options!
Meeting Your Neighbors and Making Friends
Getting to know people doesn’t have to be stressful—planning and patience can help.
Join a club or volunteer. Whether it’s at the gym, volunteering at the local rescue shelter, playing with an online gaming group or going to worship, there are many ways to be around new people. If you are living in a supportive community like First Place–Phoenix, there may also be daily activities. These are great opportunities to meet new people and make new friends.
Trial and error. It can take a few tries before you figure out what works. Talk about the weather, sports, common interests, or even something interesting or funny you saw online. Start slow and be patient—friendships take time to grow. Just saying “Hi” goes a long way; so does sharing something that makes you happy. If they don’t seem interested right away, you may want to try again before deciding they aren’t a good match and moving on to the next potential friend.
If you’re feeling anxious, that’s OK. It’s more than OK—it’s typical! Many people feel the same way. You can help manage this feeling by planning and scheduling when you want to be around new people and even letting others know you’re nervous to meet them. They may be nervous too, which can put you both at ease.
Exploring Your New Surroundings
You can learn about restaurants, shopping and entertainment—before you move.
The internet can tell you a lot about where you are going to live; so can visiting ahead of time with family or friends. Walking around an unfamiliar area with people you know can help you adjust. It can also be fun!
Schedule your exploration. By giving yourself a specific day and time to try a new restaurant or visit a new store, you can reduce any anxiety you might be feeling. Plan your routes, research public transportation and set attainable goals—like trying one new place a week.
Never forget the importance of safety. Being independent also means being mindful of any risks or dangers. A new environment can take you out of your routine or comfort zone. Research your destination, look for autism-friendly businesses and attractions, and identify quiet areas. Be mindful of your sensory triggers and have a plan for managing them (for example, noise-canceling headphones or colored-lens glasses).
Creating Comfort Through Routine
Use your first week to get into a comfortable rhythm.
Make yourself a “Week 1 Checklist.” Find your grocery store, learn your public transportation routes, discover new restaurants and, if you feel up to it, meet a neighbor.
Journal in text or pictures. Keeping track of your schedule and reflecting on each day can reinforce routines. Writing in a journal can help you think through what you did each day and reduce the stress of trying so many new things. It can also help you remember what worked and what didn’t.
Feeling at home can take time.
It can also take patience, practice—and the support of family and friends.
Do your research, involve your family and friends in the move, and get ready for some new adventures. Behind your new front door, you’ll have plenty of quiet space. Residents at communities like First Place–Phoenix know that once you step out and into a place of your own, new experiences and newfound confidence are sure to follow!
5 truths about independent living for adults with autism
Exploring the neighborhood before moving is a good idea.
Setting routines can help ease your mind.
Creating a daily plan keeps you on track.
Making friends can take time.
Less clutter = less stress!
